The last week has been surreal.
Because M isn’t an asshole, it was even harder to understand why we were breaking up.
But I guess that’s how low my benchmark for men was.
If they weren’t lying constantly, or had money issues, if they didn’t have avoidant issues, and weren’t spoiled by their parents, they were already a solid 7/10 in my books lol.
But that’s the thing, I do believe some people don’t get to meet their “soul mate” at a young age. I don’t even know if i believe in soul mates. I believe we have the chance to create a soul mate relationship with someone we meet in this life time.
M and I didn’t work out.
And I’m accepting that better than expected. I guess, I really have grown so much, to the point that I would rather be alone than be in a relationship where both people aren’t able to be their best.
I’m also accepting the fact that I may never find someone. Or that I may find someone when I’m 40, 50, 60.
This realization that my mindset has changed so much, is more comforting to me. I’m so grateful for the last few years. I’m so grateful for the privilege to heal.
And I’m excited to develop a closer relationship with myself, to truly learn how to be happy and contented – alone.